Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Time Warp Tuesday

It's Time Warp Tuesday - a Bereaved and Blessed blog-hop in which writers are asked to revisit a previous post and reflect on the journey they've taken since then.  Today's topic is "mothering" and, by chance, exactly one year ago today I wrote a post about my (un)official title as the "Best Mom in the Whole World" - a title I may or may not still hold depending on which of my children you speak to in any given moment in time.

Certainly, from Sk8terdude's perspective, I've done a pretty decent job in the Sk8termom category.  We've been on several skateboarding road trips since last May, including the biggie to SkatePark of Tampa in February.  We went to the Streetleague championship last August (despite the last-minute change of date due to the impending hurricane!).  I've spent countless hours sitting in parent lounges, videotaping, editing, and posting to this blog and, for the most part, I've done it with a fairly good attitude, considering the fact that in a million years I never would have anticipated being the mom of a skateboarder.

But we've also had some not-so-great moments this year, including Sk8terdude's latest trip to the orthopedist yesterday afternoon for what turns out to be yet another broken bone...in the pinky of his right hand.

Don't ask me how many bones he's already broken, because I've truly lost count.  (For those of you considering letting your kids skateboard, the non-skateboarding injuries still outnumber the skateboarding ones, but not by much...).  So after years of people cracking jokes about bubble-wrapping him for safety, I'm starting to wonder:  am I being the best mom by continuing to support his love of skateboarding?  Or would I really earn the "best mom" title by putting my foot down and forcing him to give up his passion?

With Mother's Day in plain sight, and with a look back at the last 12 months, I have to wonder what's really in his best interest long-term.

It was downright embarrassing to show up at the orthopedist's office yesterday.  And I haven't called either set of grandparents to tell them because, honestly, I don't want to hear their reactions.  (I won't be able to hide for long.  My in-laws will be arriving in two weeks for a short visit - and Sk8terdude will still have a purple cast.  My guess is they will notice!)

In preparation for a workshop I'll be running in June, I recently asked a group of parents to tell me what keeps them up at night.  One mom said she worried that she would be "blinded by love and not see something right in front of [her] eyes that would prevent the expected outcome of raising happy, confident, compassionate, and wise children."

Now I'm not sleeping at night, either...but maybe that up-all-night-worrying is the essence of motherhood.


  1. I'm glad to find you through TWT, and looking forward to reading more. I hope you can come to an acceptable solution for continuing to be 'best mom!'

  2. It is interesting to see where you are today vs. where you were this time last year in regards to your attitude about your son's passion for skating. I get it though. We want the best for our children. I see how watching your son get injured over and over again, even though he is doing something he loves is hard.

    I agree that it is nerve wrecking being a parent much of the time. I try to find peace and comfort in knowing that I am doing the best that I can with the information I have at the time when it comes to raising and supporting my children.

    As an aside, having little to no knowledge about the world of skateboarding, I found both your old post and this new one fascinating to read! :)

    I am so glad that you did the Time Warp with us this month and would love for you to join us again in the future!

  3. I hadn't thought of this conundrum! I don't even have advice as to how you might determine which path makes you the "best" mom. This is a case in which the levels of Maslow's hierarchy of needs are in competition -- safety on a lower rung vs self-esteem on a higher rung. How DOES a person balance those competing needs?

    Maybe your son will eventually tire of purple casts?

    Good luck with the inlaws!